homophonic: wolfwood

[camena]

Comments

[crucifer]

I've never had ice cream. Planet too hot.
Ice cream machine broken at McDonalds.

[camena]

What do you mean planet too hot?

[crucifer]

Twin suns, desert planet.
Wouldn't last five minutes.

[camena]

How do people live there?

[crucifer]

Dangerously.

[camena]

Like exploding car chases in the desert dangerously?

[crucifer]

That happens sometimes too.
Usually fun fights.
Both at the same time.
That was supposed to say gun.

[camena]

Was it actually?

[crucifer]

I'm pretty sure I typed gun. I don't know how that happened.
They can be fun though. To me at least.
Maybe not for you.

[camena]

I try to avoid gunfights generally.

How would that be fun?

[crucifer]

Adrenaline rush, mostly.
Guns are like toys, and bullets are like candy where I'm from.
Not so much in yours?
Getting that kind of impression from everyone else.

[camena]

Well

Like one stray bullet could kill you so...

[crucifer]

My specialty is that I'm a real sturdy guy.
I'm a professional at that.

[camena]

I

assume that means you are stronger against bullets than normal people?

[crucifer]

Yeah. A couple bullets won't stop me.
Also I got the Lord protecting me.

[ This is like, as literal as it gets. ]

[camena]

A lot of people think that and they can still die but

good I guess

if you're immune to bullets

that's terrifying

idk

[crucifer]

Not immune. Can still die if it hits the right places.
Just pretty good about not going down after a shot or two.

[ Should've been in superhell... ]

Occupational hazard. Is that what they call it?

[camena]

Wasn't your occupation being a priest?

[crucifer]

It is.
It comes with the territory.

[ WHEN CHURCH GIVES YOU A GUN ]

[camena]

You didn't mention gunfights last time you told me about your job.

[crucifer]

Do you tell people what's the weather like at your job?
Do you have a job
?

[camena]

Gunfire isn't weather.

And I'm a high school student, so no.

[crucifer]

I've been working since I was ten.
Maybe lower. Don't remember.
Never too early.
Great financing skills.
Probably desirable on resumes.

[camena]

That's sad. Like. Depressing.

Kids should be running around playing games all day.

Where I'm from it's technically illegal for kids to work.

[crucifer]

It was an orphanage.
Just felt like helping out.
Everyone was busy.